Post by callshot on Jul 13, 2017 12:08:07 GMT -5
A couple weeks ago I had something happen that I didn't want to talk about because I didn't thing that you all would believe me. I was in Yellowstone Park and a large herd of buffalo were walking down the road just like a parade. They had their calves on their right side so as to keep them away from the cars we were in. They all talk to each other and their calves with a low pitched grunt. I was videoing it all with my wife's camera. I haven't spoken buffalo in a while so I grunted as one nearly knocked the camera out of my hand and it did brush past the mirror. This one particular nice bison stopped and grunted back at me, and we struck up a lengthy conversation. Christine (my wife) didn't know that I spoke buffalo and got a kick out of it. I complimented her on her nice calf and ask what she had named it. She said it's name was Birtha. She wanted to name it Baby Ruth, but the dad wouldn't hear about it. I ask her name in case we run into each other again. She said she didn't like her name of Gertrude, because it had the part of Rude in it. We talked about the sign that say to keep so many feet between you and the wild buffalo. She laughed and said that was because humans don't smell very good. She complimented me on my western accent of high Clasic bison language which she don't hear too much any more. She ask me about those big busses with people that she can't understand. She said they all talk really fast like they have a tummy ache. I mentioned to her that my daughter in law could explain it to her sometime as she was made in China herself. As she starred past me and spied Christine's painted fingernails, and ask if I could do that to her hoofs. We could have but didn't have enough top coat finish to really make them shine. I said we would bring more next time. She wanted her picture taken with me in my Callshot cap, but the other buffalo were getting anxious to get on their way. She grunted really loud at them so they would be patient for a few minute longer. They complied but started doing a wave like they were in a sports event and everyone thought it was a cluster of earthquakes near by. One other buffalo near by said that was nothing, just wait until August 21st. when we do our eclipse maneuver. Now, I expect that you are all doubting me on this, but it all really happened just the way I have just said. Just then some fake news casters began showing up so they decided to move on. We said our goodbyes and planned to meet again later. Well today is that day we planned to meet up again. She did mention that I shouldn't bring anyone that don't wear shoes on this trip. Crocks are ok, but just barely tolerable. Not to bring any Tank tops or Hide Stretchers and definitely anybody with 2 dogs. Now I swear on my yellow page phone book that this is all true. I could show the pictures but it would take too long and too much space here. I must now face the fact that we will meet again and I am packing so don't bring any white jackets with padlock arm sleeves. There is quite a bit more to this story, but will have to write it later, after today's gathering! I hope she recognizes me, because I will be in my pickup instead of the van. They all grunted again as they walked down the road. So long olde girl.
Then I woke up!
Then I woke up!